“These scuba divers are claiming a new world record after playing the same card game underwater for 36 hours. The 16 divers – who worked in shifts so they could change oxygen tanks – sat on the bottom of a pool in Geiselhoering, Germany, playing a favourite local game called ‘sheepshead’. Organiser Eric Schlegelmilch said: ‘We gave up counting who owed what after an hour. We didn’t want anyone going belly up.’ Now the group plan to contact Guinness World Records officials with a video record of their stunt.” w/ photo

“Julia Roberts fanatic, Miljenko Parserisas Bukovic, has tattooed his body with 82 different images of her face. Parserisas, a 56-year-old newspaper seller from Mexico, revealed his inked artwork in a photo shoot in Valparaiso city. He has so far spent a million Mexican pesos (just over $70,000) for the 82 tattoos. The newspaper vendor’s obsession with tattoos of Roberts started after he watched her in Erin Brockovich. In the film Roberts plays a legal assistant who brings down a US energy company single handedly. The American actress is tattooed all over Mr Parserisas’ body in artwork inspired by a number of scenes from the film. The Roberts fanatic has said that he has plans to get more faces inked on his chest, back and arms.” w/ photo

“Watermelon skiing isn’t for the faint hearted, nor is it for those with feeble bones. But that’s not stopping folks in Queensland, Australia from giving it a whirl.” — AP

“Exhibit A for why soccer is by far the dumbest sport ever created.” — Revolushuniza

“A man in rural Chickasha, Okla. is under arrest after an unsuccessful attempt to steal a chainsaw, but putting it in his shorts. “I felt sorry for him, I thought the gentleman was crippled,” one employee said as he described what the thief looked like walking through the store. An employee chased the man outside. He reportedly dropped the chainsaw and climbed a tree. He apparently jumped into a creek but was cornered as he tried to get away… the 21-year-old appeared to be intoxicated when he was arrested.”

“Hello and welcome to OLD MEMEs. Seriously, newfags need to learn their place and leave Internet humor alone. As for the ‘stars’ of this train wreck, your 15 minutes are over, get on with your life.” — chasoepoch

“Finally, a Holiday I can get behind. In fact, let’s replace Valentines Day with Phil Collins Day. Oh, and Christmas? Let’s replace it with another Phil Collins Day.” — raggedy

“This is my buddy Boris proudly showing off his ‘shaving helmet’. My roommate Kenny volunteered for the demonstration.” — mattinbrooklyn

“This is Jerome Smith, a heavily-tattooed 29-year-old arrested on suspicion of assaulting a pregnant woman. Smith, from Cincinnati, Ohio, is alleged to have hit the woman, who is eight-months gone, in the head with a gun… But his tattooed face has the misspelled word ‘Jenius’ on his forehead. The ‘J’ may be a cursive ‘G’, in which case Smith should have demanded a refund from the tattooist for their amateur work.” w/ photo

“This is what happens when stoners remember the ideas they have when they are high.”