“Lesson 1: don’t try to put it out by releasing more gas.” — tylerbrainerd

“Tricked half orange can fill two glasses of orange juice and keep on giving.”

“At least he didn’t kill it and eat it.”

“A shame it’s not living where it should be living, but I gotta admit. That’s the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life.” — Carlish

“My cat, Gomer, suckling on my earlobe as if it were a teat.” — Guiswa

“Wait for it… Wai… Oh! Mwahahahahahaha!”

“He’s fat. He’s a fuck… and he’s in a barrel.” — R.R13

“This is hilarious because it’s 100% true. The cutthroat parking situation, frustratingly small carts, how they’re always ‘just out’ of samples & the list goes on. The only thing more annoying than their high prices, are the OTHER whole foods customers.” — farronazalia

“I want to see what his view was!”

“His soul is leaving him at :20…” — bitejacker